I can’t be arsed with curly kale
The last bag that I bought
Stayed in the fridge, till mush became
Life’s just too fuckin short
I love springs greens and cauliflower
Cress, pak choi, Little Gems
But I can’t be arsed with curly kale
It’s all those bleeding stems!
Don’t tell me, you can leave them on
You can’t, they hard and fibrous
And when you think you’ve got them all
Loads more appear, to chide us
It’s just not user friendly, it’s
Too fiddly to prepare
Picking out all the woody bits
Drives me to despair
If kale was all that Jesus had
When feeding the five thou
They’d all have died of hunger
And he’d still be sat there now
No prizes for this vegetable
It really does my swede in
Like King Herod of allottments
I’d kill off all the seedlings (Boo!)
You might think that I go too far
In calling for a massacre
But I can’t be arsed with curly kale
Unhandy, wanky brassica.
The Mark Hurst Blog 